our next adventure: moving

Back on good ól American soil! Yes, silence on le blog resumes as we continue to recover from our glorious days in Rio (such an amazing trip!!) plus, I am fully into the school grind in my last semester at Moody (what!?) plus, we are working our booties off to save save save for a very special move coming this December!

I swore I would not post this beyond cheesy video we recorded on our last beach day in Brasil. But, I kinda couldn't help myself because I like our cheese (smiles) and we love cheese (the dairy) so it's allllllll good. :)

Rio photos to come, soon.? Hopefully!
Our next adventure awaits us in........

Happy tears. & can you tell we totally have a thing for saying "yaaaaay!?" it is in many of our videos. lol
We thank you all who love, support & pray for us on our journey. We are so grateful for you. More details about our move to come, so stay tuned. ;)

to the homeland we go!

The aroma of pizza is in the air. Bath products and washed clothes everywhere. Passports in their new leather holders. An emptied iPhone ready to take photos for a new adventure together.

WE ARE GOING TO RIO!

Ah! Even though g surprised me with tickets three weekends ago, it has only hit me today that we are actually going to Brasil together for the very first time. This last week has been hectic preparing for our trip, school, and interviewing plus getting two new  babysitting jobs for the rest of the year. Whoa. God is so good. I feel like His blessings have been coming all at once after feeling like He was almost absent in a summer that felt like constant struggle. But I am so thankful.

I don't know when I'll be back to posting on the blog because when we arrive on the 25th, school will have already started and so will my new job. So here we go!

Cheers to living & eating some late night Digiorno & going on last minute vacations just because it's the two of us & we can. ;)

Thank you Lord for your faithfulness to us.
We don't deserve it one bit, yet you give so graciously.
You are good.

we will know Him more deeply

Sunday.

You know when life just feels so impossible, when sadness just looms? This defined the beginning of last week completely. I felt so overwhelmed by the circumstances that were not going the way I hoped & dreamed in my life, my marriage to g & our future. Trust. Again, this battle with trusting the Lord with all your heart and leaning not on your own understanding. This struggle felt like it was defining my life. It had been for a long time.

Monday.

A long & hard day. I took no photos, which for me says it all. Heavy, sad, lost, hopeless.

Tuesday.

Was unbearable. I felt extremely low most of the morning & called my mom in the afternoon. I shared what I was feeling and just cried. I spent time with Iman which always brightens my day (we love this park) and spoke with G that night by the Navy Peir. That conversation that was full of mixed emotions and was so hard at times for the both of us, but in the end we both felt the same - our relationship in the midst of imperfect circumstances was worth fighting for. For a moment I gave up on things getting better. I thought, I'll just have to settle & force myself to be happy with the way things are. Just be sad always. But g loves me so well; his comfort and wise words in my lowest days allow me to see the light again. & I knew things would change for the better. Reminded that there was more to life than my current woes. 

Wednesday.

I had the day off and woke up with a sudden change of mind. I will not put all of my trust in circumstance. No, God is the strength of my heart & my portion forever. In Christ there is joy and peace. I listened to a message from John Piper that morning about suffering, and was so encouraged. He affirmed my pain for what had been lost or was simply not present in my life at this moment, but also confirmed that we need to consider only Christ as gain (Phil. 3:5-11) in this life and all else as loss because Christ can never be taken away from us, but all else can. I had been placing my happiness and joy in what had been lost, so there I was - lost. But I feel my eyes have been literally opened to the truth that all I do have is a gift; Jesus - He is all that I need. I exercised that day & cooked delicious healthy food. Body, mind, spirit & soul - I felt so lead to feed every part of me. 

G & I went for a really amazing walk that night and it was like magic; everything seemed different & life felt good again. Circumstances, mostly the same, but no longer in control of everything. 

Thursday.

Another day that felt uplifting even though I was stuck at my internship all day. & a sunset walk that was pretty magical. Again, I see the light; God is near. My fears fading, embracing imperfection. 

Friday.

G's boss was giving away free tickets to the Bears game. No, football is not my idea of a special date, but again I felt like God was saying I'm here. I see you, I know what you're going through & I will provide. We decided to walk home, and we're not quite sure why because it's about a 3.5 mile walk, but we did it & found $20 on the ground of Michigan Ave. What?! 

This famous street is filled with people constantly, yet the bill laid right there before us. We were in shock & so excited walking the rest of the way home in disbelief. 

Saturday. 

I woke up feeling blessed. After having brunch paid by our $20 find, I was thankful & overwhelmed by knowing God was with us & on our side. I shared  this with g on our walk to the zoo. He smiled & agreed, all these things were not just coincidence. Each small & large blessing is from Him, you see. This is what He has been showing me lately. This week was special & I know it was so uniquely orchestrated by God Himself. All of life is, but now I am reminded by this. He is leading me into deeper trusting. 

In loss & pain & confusion, Christ; our only hope & constant Love. In the message I heard from Piper that Wednesday, one of the last things that he said was this, 

"We will know Him more deeply through suffering." 

Yes, I will continue to pray & affirm, I long to know you Lord.

"that one friday"

Today, it happened. My summer internship at Cornerstone Counseling Center has come to an end! Yay!! It has been quite the journey. To say the least, I am so happy my hours are complete. But mostly I'm happy because the internship, with all it's highs and lows, has given me a lot of clarity about what next steps to take career wise and that is really what I needed to get out of it. I can definitely thank my Mississippi born & raised supervisor for that! He is now officially Dr. George Ball by the way. (& we all can't help but say his name without the southern accent) lol So.....I'm thankful. 

Also, I must say I'm thankful for my fellow interns who made me laugh (almost hysterically sometimes, Tori!) and worked hard with me and were angry with me and reached the end of the finish line with me. We did it! So now, we celebrate over donuts & I get to share these photos from a couple Fridays ago where we got to roam around the city between duties & take lots of silly pictures along the way. (thanks time-scheduled post!) 

I absolutely had to borrow the title for this post from Alex when she posted some of these photos on fb. There were many mixed feelings that day, but I won't get into THAT. Anywho, exploring with these ladies was just so fun & I enjoyed getting to know them these past few months. So, I added some short descriptions I love about them throughout the post. Happy Friday everyone! 

^ meet alex! she's smart, cunning & has the best sense of humor; and we're both ESFJ's - yes. ^

^ meet chantee! she is fun, giddy and one of the sweetest people (with the prettiest curly hair) I have ever met. ^

^ meet tori! she is hilarious (to the max!), random, caring & so so fun. ^

you see! just look at those curls!

Thanks for a fun day in the city ladies! 

Interning with you (and you too JP!) has made the experience so much more sweet. 

Cheers to being done & to freedom & donuts!

worth the fight

Because marriage really is hard, but it is also very worth it. & our daily sunset walks in the summer make me smile.

already month eight?

Is it just me or did July just fly by without even stopping to say hello? Really?! I feel like I'm still waiting for the 4th of July to come along with endless beach days & walks to the farmers market. But this already happened & it's already August! Ugh. Honestly, this past week I felt stuck in a rut. Like time was moving, but I was still & unsure of what to do with it. I felt bored, tired and lazy. I wasn't even in the mood to do the things I love doing like writing, going for a walk, or doing my nails. Yes, I even said no to window shopping! This is just not like me.

I am so hoping that in this new week, really this new month I will feel more present. There are so many changes happening around me & in me, I feel. Like there is a shift but where am I in it? Have you ever felt this way? It's a bit disorienting & strange. But daily in my little faith I'm slowly learning to trust God in the change. To trust Him in my questions, doubts & shifting feelings. To love through it all.

So here's to August. Good things are coming & all I want to be present; I pray for presence, His & mine.

images from August 1st & 2nd, top left by swopes.