I clearly remember the mood of this day: irritated, annoyed, depressed. I know, after looking through these photos you'd never tell, but on this day I just felt down. It was a Sunday in October, during a very hard few weeks for me overall. Maybe it was the crazy heat when I so craved changing colors and a chill in the air. Maybe the fact that I just felt SO unmotivated to do anything at all. There were days I'd wake up in the morning for about an hour and go right back to bed until I had to get ready for work, just because I would rather sleep than do anything else. Many days felt like a struggle as I tried to motivate myself to do more, get into a routine, just do something.
This day was no different. It was another Sunday we slept in and missed church. I felt guilty and low. G was busy doing his school things, and I was left unsure of what to do at home; I didn't want to go out. The day lingered on when at about 4 p.m. G said, "lets go to the beach." Honestly, my first instinct was to say no, even to my favorite beach, the one we discovered spontaneously during our first few weeks in SD. But then I thought, why not go? It was in the 80's on the coast and the day was gorgeous. I didn't do my hair or put on makeup, just changed clothes. So off we went.
When we arrived, G sat still and I ran toward the ocean.
There's something healing about looking at something so much grander than you. So wild, dangerous, huge, so vast...and knowing who holds it together. I watched the water move; on this day it looked like the most beautiful dance. The way each wave would swirl into each other and crash. I had crashed, and I needed my Savior to catch me again. I needed to dance with Him again. To rest in His perfect peace. All I know is as the sun set, we healed. God was looking at our storm, and calming our ocean as we watched the sun disappear. By the end, we smiled, cuddled and felt alive again.
As I write this I realize how significant that night really was. This is grace, this is amazing Love.
No comments:
Post a Comment