Lately, God has been opening my eyes.
Spiritually and internally opening my eyes to the truths of life. Its a season of change, and dare I say, growth I've been praying for for a long time. Interestingly, I've been working on this post for a few weeks now, and this weekend fall has officially begun, the ultimate season of change, and it's this weekend that this post is finally done. Not a coincidence, Lord Jesus, you are GOOD.
Normally, I would keep this good news to myself. Afraid that saying it out load, or putting it on paper would jinx whats happening inside. But I refuse to let fear rule over my life any longer! I'm saying, "Fear, get the freak away from me! I'm moving into the light." This is a daily practice, and some days are better than others, but by the grace of God my mindset changing, and that is allowing me to see myself and others more graciously as we fight the good fight and run the race.
Normally, I would keep this good news to myself. Afraid that saying it out load, or putting it on paper would jinx whats happening inside. But I refuse to let fear rule over my life any longer! I'm saying, "Fear, get the freak away from me! I'm moving into the light." This is a daily practice, and some days are better than others, but by the grace of God my mindset changing, and that is allowing me to see myself and others more graciously as we fight the good fight and run the race.
Side note: please, PLEASE don't compare your life to the pictures I post on the blog.
I know, it's kind of inevitable in one sense., and sometimes I do it too.
But, what I mean is, please don't feel bad about your relationships, your struggles, your LIFE,
by looking at images.
These memories are some of the best moments of our life, the crème de la crème.
The things I don't wanna forget,
so when I'm having the hardest day or feel so discouraged I don't want to get out of bed
(Yes, I have those days) I can look back and remember the blessings and feel grateful again.
I think we all need those reminders sometimes.
Although I always try to be transparent about the realities of marriage and faith and life,
often when we're feeling vulnerable or down we cant help but compare.
On that note, I''ll leave you with this:
Darling, a beautiful thing is never perfect.
I saved this quote I saw on Instagram as a reminder to myself, that often times the beautiful things I see looking at others are a result of work. And often, lots of hard work that goes unseen. I can't think of a better transition to the topic of this NEW (its been a while!) words from the wiser post about intimacy.
Here's something that not many married couples talk about: struggling with sex.
Oh yes, I went there. Sex is a delicate subject, a beautiful act and a life-changing experience. However, many make light of it. One night stands are common, and having sex on the third date, or any date before the one you say, "I do" has become normal. What saddens me is this: people have no idea of the trauma they are causing to their souls by living this way. There's a reason why God says it's not good for man to be alone. But the Bible also says, "...man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh." Eph. 5:31 God designed sex to be enjoyed in a bond only shared between a husband and wife. But what if you saved yourself for marriage, or understand the depths of what it means, and still sex is shameful, disappointing or is just non existent? Author and relationship expert Tracy McMillan says this: Relationships are a spiritual path. I couldn't agree more. Relationships are not linear, and neither is sex. Sex is spiritual, as well as emotional and physical. That's what makes it so complex, difficult at times and blissful in others.
Aaron and Jennifer Smith (from Unveiled Wife) are a Christian couple who love Jesus, have a lot to say about this in their video titled, "Our Personal Struggle with Intimacy in Marriage" If you relate to struggling with sex and intimacy in your life, I'd encourage you to watch this video. It is honest, informational and encouraging.
G and I have sure had our fair share of struggles with sex and intimacy in our marriage, which is one reason I wanted to share on this topic. But let me tell you something true: healing is possible! I don't say this from a place of perfection, or having reached an ideal place in life, but I do say it from a place of working hard through struggle again and again, with a lot of prayer and counsel, which I want more of! On the outside, we all look pretty put together, but no one ever really knows what's going on within a marriage, or a life from the outside. So lets be kind to ourselves, and to one another! Jesus loves us, and gives us freedom to work through our pain with Him on our side, and this is how healing happens. In the light, and not in hiding. In relationship, and not alone.
I hope you enjoyed this post and watch this video! Even if just one person is encouraged by it and that person is you, know that you are not alone. If you'd like more content on this subject, or if you have any suggestions for future posts, please share in the comments and let me know!
with love always,
Tiffany Olives
The Smiths YouTube Channel: Marriage After God
